If you ever have a relationship problem and you want an unbiased opinion, tell us about it. We'll put it on the Relationship Roundtable.
Here's the latest email:
Hey Tim & Jeff,
As the youngest of seven kids by a fair margin, and who didn't resemble anyone on either side of the family, my father always ostracized me and made it very clear to everyone that I was not his. My siblings followed his lead, and the only vaguely familial relationship I've had in the past 30 years has been with my mother and my husband's family. Recently, in a twist worthy of a soap opera, one of my brothers needed a transplant and surprise, surprise, I was the only compatible donor. I guess that was enough to prove paternity to them, because now I'm receiving invitations to family gatherings, but no apologies, as though we've always been close. It would have meant everything to me when I was younger, but after years of being treated like a non-entity, I've made my peace and have no desire to associate with them. I wasn't going to let my brother suffer, but wonder if they would have done the same for me. How do I tactfully tell them to leave me alone? I don't want to hurt my mother (or any of them, really), but the thought of pretending the past 30 years of neglect never happened is incredibly annoying and pretty hurtful.
Tired of my fam from Bella Vista.
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